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darkhavensToday is my 6th LJversary! On this day in 2003, ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
darkhavens came into this world on wobbly legs with a shifty look in her eyes. And in almost no time at all, there was porn. :D
In celebration of this auspicious occasion, I decided that I should revisit my first love, Spander. I didn't quite manage porn, but there's sexin' in there, if you squint. ;)
Author:darkhavens
Title: Five Things Xander Harris Gave Up After Getting Involved With Spike
Fandom: Pairing: Buffy: Spike/Xander
Rating: PG13
Words: 500
Concrit: Please. If you spot a typo or a grammar glitch, feel free to tell me in comments.
Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be. No harm, no foul, no money made.
Warnings/Squicks: None
Summary: Some things are worth the sacrifice.
Notes: Written as part of my participation in![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
mini_nanowrimo this year, and also for prompt #228 at slashthedrabble: 'Left'.
Five Things Xander Harris Gave Up After Getting Involved With Spike
1. His sanity. No, really. He's spent a lot of years telling Buffy she must have been crazy to get involved with Angel, and if there's one thing that Alexander LaVelle Harris isn't, it's a hypocrite.
But if sanity means not having Spike in his life and his bed, then sanity is most definitely over-rated. Just call him Xander the Crazy and let him get on with it.
He thinks he might begin to worry if his limited edition commemorative action figures start talking to him like the terrifying Miss Edith did to Dru, but unless – until? – that happens, he figures he's doing okay.
2. Control of the remote – any remote, including the ones for the TV, the DVR, the DVD player, the stereo… and the multi-function, twisting, thrusting vibrator that Spike brought home last month as a surprise.
It probably would have been less of a surprise if Spike had waited until Xander was awake before applying it, but, everything considered, it was a pleasant surprise.
3. Saturday morning cartoons. This was a close call, he’ll admit, maybe, if you ask him when Spike is a couple of miles outside of hearing distance, but he doesn't regret it.
He'd much rather spend the early hours of Saturday mornings being used as a human blanket by the vampire in his bed. He's not sure how Spike does it, but no matter how they're lying when they go to sleep, whether spooned or tangled up together somehow, Xander always seems to wake with Spike tucked almost completely underneath him, his face buried either in Xander's chest or the pillow, his hands and feet jammed into the pockets of warmth at Xander's armpits and between his knees.
Anyway, he can usually manage to get his hands on the DVR remote while Spike is either showering or touching up his roots (or his nails), so he can set it to record his favorite shows to watch while Spike is out winning baskets of kittens or Mastering the Hellmouth.
4. Garlic. Not because it's lethal to vampires; it's really not. But Spike claims he has sensitive taste buds, and apparently certain flavours can affect a person's taste more than others, like pineapple, cinnamon and mint.
Xander doesn't miss cauliflower at all, but he did love garlic bread with pizza.
He loves blowjobs more, though.
5. Growing Old. Oh, Spike hasn't said anything too obvious yet, but Xander knows it's just a matter of time. There was a grey hair in his pubes last week, not that he would have noticed if Spike hadn't yanked it out and waved it under his nose while looking angry and terrified by turns.
He's okay with the idea, really. He's been weighing up the pros and cons for quite a while now, and he knows that not losing Spike – not forcing Spike to lose him, one grey hair at a time – outweighs every other concern he could think of.
He's okay with losing everything else, so long as he gets to keep Spike.
darkhavens came into this world on wobbly legs with a shifty look in her eyes. And in almost no time at all, there was porn. :DIn celebration of this auspicious occasion, I decided that I should revisit my first love, Spander. I didn't quite manage porn, but there's sexin' in there, if you squint. ;)
Author:
darkhavensTitle: Five Things Xander Harris Gave Up After Getting Involved With Spike
Fandom: Pairing: Buffy: Spike/Xander
Rating: PG13
Words: 500
Concrit: Please. If you spot a typo or a grammar glitch, feel free to tell me in comments.
Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be. No harm, no foul, no money made.
Warnings/Squicks: None
Summary: Some things are worth the sacrifice.
Notes: Written as part of my participation in
mini_nanowrimo this year, and also for prompt #228 at slashthedrabble: 'Left'.Five Things Xander Harris Gave Up After Getting Involved With Spike
1. His sanity. No, really. He's spent a lot of years telling Buffy she must have been crazy to get involved with Angel, and if there's one thing that Alexander LaVelle Harris isn't, it's a hypocrite.
But if sanity means not having Spike in his life and his bed, then sanity is most definitely over-rated. Just call him Xander the Crazy and let him get on with it.
He thinks he might begin to worry if his limited edition commemorative action figures start talking to him like the terrifying Miss Edith did to Dru, but unless – until? – that happens, he figures he's doing okay.
2. Control of the remote – any remote, including the ones for the TV, the DVR, the DVD player, the stereo… and the multi-function, twisting, thrusting vibrator that Spike brought home last month as a surprise.
It probably would have been less of a surprise if Spike had waited until Xander was awake before applying it, but, everything considered, it was a pleasant surprise.
3. Saturday morning cartoons. This was a close call, he’ll admit, maybe, if you ask him when Spike is a couple of miles outside of hearing distance, but he doesn't regret it.
He'd much rather spend the early hours of Saturday mornings being used as a human blanket by the vampire in his bed. He's not sure how Spike does it, but no matter how they're lying when they go to sleep, whether spooned or tangled up together somehow, Xander always seems to wake with Spike tucked almost completely underneath him, his face buried either in Xander's chest or the pillow, his hands and feet jammed into the pockets of warmth at Xander's armpits and between his knees.
Anyway, he can usually manage to get his hands on the DVR remote while Spike is either showering or touching up his roots (or his nails), so he can set it to record his favorite shows to watch while Spike is out winning baskets of kittens or Mastering the Hellmouth.
4. Garlic. Not because it's lethal to vampires; it's really not. But Spike claims he has sensitive taste buds, and apparently certain flavours can affect a person's taste more than others, like pineapple, cinnamon and mint.
Xander doesn't miss cauliflower at all, but he did love garlic bread with pizza.
He loves blowjobs more, though.
5. Growing Old. Oh, Spike hasn't said anything too obvious yet, but Xander knows it's just a matter of time. There was a grey hair in his pubes last week, not that he would have noticed if Spike hadn't yanked it out and waved it under his nose while looking angry and terrified by turns.
He's okay with the idea, really. He's been weighing up the pros and cons for quite a while now, and he knows that not losing Spike – not forcing Spike to lose him, one grey hair at a time – outweighs every other concern he could think of.
He's okay with losing everything else, so long as he gets to keep Spike.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
on 2009-11-04 07:09 am (UTC)Mastering the Hellmouth! Bwah! And Lily was asleep until I got to that bit, heee!
I love Xander as Spike's blanket and I agree that not losing Spike is more vital than any other issue.
♥ ♥ ♥
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on 2009-11-04 07:30 am (UTC)no subject
on 2009-11-04 07:40 am (UTC)Gabrielle
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on 2009-11-04 09:30 am (UTC)no subject
on 2009-11-04 09:56 am (UTC)That is frickin hilarious!
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on 2009-11-04 10:24 am (UTC)Happy LJ-versary. See you on Friday :-)
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on 2009-11-04 10:41 am (UTC)Happy LJversary! And many thanks - I wouldn't have found LJ and a home in fandom without
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on 2009-11-04 11:05 am (UTC)no subject
on 2009-11-04 11:33 am (UTC)This was delightful and so very Xander. Lovely!
*twirls you*
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on 2009-11-04 12:13 pm (UTC)Marie
And I give up
on 2009-11-04 01:35 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2009-11-04 01:57 pm (UTC)Ahahahahaha! That Spike, a ruthless killer and a pursuer of kittens and good hair.
He loves blowjobs more, though.
Smart lad!
He's okay with losing everything else, so long as he gets to keep Spike.
Awwww! *explodes into puddle of goo*
Very nice!
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on 2009-11-04 01:57 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2009-11-04 03:04 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2009-11-04 03:27 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2009-11-04 03:41 pm (UTC)Happy LJversary - you may have started a trend.
Shakatany
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on 2009-11-04 04:10 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2009-11-04 04:31 pm (UTC)Anyway, he can usually manage to get his hands on the DVR remote while Spike is either showering or touching up his roots (or his nails), so he can set it to record his favorite shows to watch while Spike is out winning baskets of kittens or Mastering the Hellmouth.
LOL, kittens!
LOVES!!!!
On this day in 2003, [info]darkhavens came into this world on wobbly legs with a shifty look in her eyes. And in almost no time at all, there was porn.
LOL! This fandom has much to thank you for. Thank ALL the gods for you ~clings~
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on 2009-11-04 04:52 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2009-11-04 05:26 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2009-11-04 05:43 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2009-11-04 06:13 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2009-11-04 06:21 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2009-11-04 09:35 pm (UTC)Happy LJanniversary! Awesomesauce, bay-bee.
*spins you*
And whooooooooot, i luff this. Especially the last one and the 'lost control of all remotes' thing. Heeeeee! Of coz.
*smooches*
Happy 'versary!
on 2009-11-04 09:56 pm (UTC)Great set - with the sneaky cartoons, the happy sexing as promised and the potentially sinister little ending hint too.
no subject
on 2009-11-05 01:30 am (UTC)no subject
on 2009-11-05 01:44 am (UTC)He loves blowjobs more, though.
*laughs*
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on 2009-11-05 03:33 am (UTC)Happy LJversary, baby! *smishes*
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on 2009-11-05 06:31 am (UTC)These are great - there is a lovely progression to them. I especially love the considered promise (one grey hair at a time) of the last one. *sighs happily*
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on 2009-11-05 06:47 am (UTC)no subject
on 2009-11-05 07:05 am (UTC)no subject
on 2009-11-05 07:31 am (UTC)no subject
on 2009-11-05 02:08 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2009-11-06 06:16 am (UTC)~Alice~
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on 2009-11-08 12:12 pm (UTC)Happy LJVersary, sweetheart! LJ wouldn't be the same without you. *hugs and snogs*
no subject
on 2009-11-09 02:31 pm (UTC)