darkhavens: (hp quill [literati])
[personal profile] darkhavens
On the 18th of November 2003, I read my first Spander fic, Waiting Here by Alexandria Brown, expecting to laugh at the impossibility of those two ever working together. I had never read slash before in my life. Oh, how innocent I was.

Three parts in and I fell completely in love with the pairing, and the idea of the pairing, which meant that as soon as I finished that fic, I went trolling for more.

I've fallen in love with other boys since then - John/Rodney of Stargate Atlantis, and Sam/Dean of Supernatural - but Spike/Xander will always be my first and best love, the one that got me writing and posting fic.

So, to celebrate my fourth Spanderversary, I bring you fic!
(It was supposed to be a 'Five' fic but I'm still having issues with the writing thing, so it's a 'Two'. *g*)


Author: darkhavens
Title: The Punctuation of Xander
Fandom: Pairing: Buffy: Spike/Xander
Rating: PG-13
Words: 741
Concrit: darkhavens @ slashverse.com. If you spot a typo, please feel free to tell me in comments. I want you to!
Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be. No harm, no foul, no money made.
Notes: This is set in the Protected!verse, where Spike and Xander are in an established relationship and have decided that they want to be together for as long as possible, but without turning Xander. Xander bears scars and tattoos and other markings of spells and protections gifted to him by various demons. Each fic tells the story of one or more of these markings. Each fic can be read separately, with no knowledge of the rest of the 'verse.



Most people think that the tiny tattooed comma near the corner of Xander's mouth is a vanity-inspired stylistic dimple. When someone asks about it, he just shrugs and smiles and lets his not-a-dimple wink in and out.

It's easier than telling most of them the truth - that it's the mark of honorary kinship with the Crah'sheq Clan, the ruling house of the Davrek demon nation with its worldwide population of roughly 75,000, all of whom would view him as a boy prince deserving of respect and protection, and maybe even personal sacrifice.

How to explain that he was adopted (and magically tattooed) into demonic princehood for having the balls to stop Buffy from getting her slay on, and for telling Giles he'd got a translation wrong and nearly caused the collapse of the Davrek nation into anarchy.

Of course, it wasn't quite that simple. He'd actually ended up sending Spike off to deflect Buffy from her hunt and kill mission while he explained to Giles, in embarrassing, demonic sex-shop-referencing detail, how he came to know the Davrek symbols for 'congress', 'dangerous', 'internal', 'pressure' and 'lubricate thoroughly' - not that that last one was strictly necessary for the corrected translation, but by then he was on a roll. A short roll. A roll that rolled at full speed through TMI-ville, out the other side and straight into Holy-crap-did-I-just-actually-say-that-to-Giles-town.

So yeah, vanity-inspired stylistic dimple is simpler. Also much more effective at getting him checked out and hit on and gifted with phone numbers - at least while Spike isn't flashing fang at anyone who stands too close or stares too long or just plain smiles wrong. Spike's never pretended not to be a jealously possessive lover, and Xander's never pretended not to appreciate that fact. It's a symbiosis that works well for them.

~~~~~~~

There are three little dots on the palm of Xander's right hand, carefully placed to pick out a tiny triangle joining his heart line, his life line and the almost imperceptible crease that the Ashenn insists is his kah line - the line that tells the story of the power of his tongue.

The Ashenn insists that story is a great one, that his tongue has saved hundreds of lives and will save thousands more. Xander's not entirely convinced - he can barely see the faint little groove, especially in amongst the other lines and creases and scars that cover his workman's hands. But the Ashenn insists and Spike kicks his ankle under the table to get his attention so he can give his patented 'Shut the fuck up and listen, you dozy git' glare. So Xander shuts up and listens and lets the Ashenn burn three surprisingly pain-free spots on his palm with a smoking twig.

Xander doesn't ask about the twig, or the smoking, or the painlessness thing. Life with Spike has taught him that 'ignorance is bliss' isn't just a platitude for the brainless of the world. Sometimes a smoking twig is not just a smoking twig and at those times Xander is content to remain ignorant.

He does however ask 'why?' but the answer is vague enough that it still leaves him pretty damn blissful.

Blissful, but with a handy dandy way to test for possible poisoning. The bliss is slightly disturbed by the fact that the Ashenn seemed to think the gift would one day be necessary.

It was still a cool trick, and one they test exhaustively. The Ashenn said they could use it to test 'food and drink, emollients and unguents' - basically anything absorbed or ingested by the body.

It isn't hard to tell the difference between 'not advisable' - which, scarily enough, encompasses most store-bought lubricants - and 'highly toxic' - the response they get to Xoltec slime.

'Not advisable' feels itchy - a spider skittering in frantic little circles on his palm. 'Highly toxic', by contrast, burns like acid.

Over time they discover a thousand and one reactions in between the two, from the tingle-zap of cinnamon oil - putting a minor crimp in their plans for spicy sex games - to the unexpected searing burn of Spike's latest delivery of Absinthe. (Net result: two dead demons, three injured and a whole new supply chain to facilitate Spike's love of the Green Fairy. And a plethora of fairy jokes that gets Xander spanked when he won't shut up. They count that as a win for each of them.)



mini_nanowrimo running total: 8383 words, in 18 days

on 2007-11-19 08:47 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] outsideth3box.livejournal.com
Oh yes! I love fics where Xander is recognized as a person with admirable qualities and abilities.

I also love his hard-won knowledge that sometimes ignorance *is* bliss, LOL!

And the spankings for too many fairy jokes...Bwahahahahahahahah!!!!

Love it love it love it. ::nods::

on 2007-11-19 09:29 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] allyndra.livejournal.com
I love this 'verse! It's so nice to see an addition to it. These are both great - they're funny, but more than that, they're a wonderful glimpse into Spike and Xander's interactions with the demon world. Very nice!

Happy Anniversary!

on 2007-11-19 10:40 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] bmblbee.livejournal.com
Excellent. You can tell such imaginative tales
in so few words, and toss in a touch of emotion too.

on 2007-11-19 11:07 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] mayalaen.livejournal.com
I like this 'verse and am glad you updated it. It makes me smile :)

on 2007-11-19 01:55 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] kargrif.livejournal.com
hee! awesome fic! loved it!
Posted by [identity profile] katbcoll.livejournal.com
And a plethora of fairy jokes that gets Xander spanked when he won't shut up. They count that as a win for each of them.
HEEEEE *laughs*

A roll that rolled at full speed through TMI-ville, out the other side and straight into Holy-crap-did-I-just-actually-say-that-to-Giles-town.
Oh my god! That's gotta be my favorite line. Not just because it's funny, but it's so Xander. *dies*

Ohhhh this was so nice to see this morning! Happy Spanderversary!

on 2007-11-19 02:51 pm (UTC)
tabaqui: (s&xbyliterati)
Posted by [personal profile] tabaqui
Oooooh, i love! Love love love. The boys with scars or tattoos or *both* is always intriguing.
:)
Happy Spander day!

*wow. totally have no clue when i first read Spander of any sort.*

on 2007-11-19 03:58 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] riani1.livejournal.com
The one, the original, the Spander. It's good to get back to the boys.

on 2007-11-19 04:16 pm (UTC)
ext_30178: (xander axe)
Posted by [identity profile] noandwhere.livejournal.com
A roll that rolled at full speed through TMI-ville, out the other side and straight into Holy-crap-did-I-just-actually-say-that-to-Giles-town.

Gorgeously IC. But you need to tell us how Xander's tongue has saved hundreds of lives and will save thousands more. I wanna hear that story! *g*

on 2007-11-19 05:35 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] shakatany.livejournal.com
Lovely.

So you're another victim convert by way of Alexandria Brown's "Waiting Here" - it was my first Spander fic too. I wonder how many of us are out there?

Shakatany

on 2007-11-19 08:32 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] twilightofmagic.livejournal.com
What a terrific idea for a series and wonderfully written. I enjoyed that very much ;-)

on 2007-11-19 10:48 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] ausgezeichnet.livejournal.com
Sooo cute. You really captured Xander's inner voice.

on 2007-11-19 10:49 pm (UTC)
ext_30096: (Default)
Posted by [identity profile] yanagi-wa.livejournal.com
This is really good. I do love a smart Xander story. Thank you.

on 2007-11-19 11:21 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] reremouse.livejournal.com
hee! I should have known you'd celebrate with punctuation - you and your overflowing baskets of commas!

And this? A roll that rolled at full speed through TMI-ville, out the other side and straight into Holy-crap-did-I-just-actually-say-that-to-Giles-town. is so one of the best Xander prose lines in the big book of memorable Xander prose. Rock on, Spander-lovin' woman. Rock on.

on 2007-11-20 12:23 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] melanie2525.livejournal.com
Happy Spanderversary back at ya! So glad you gifted us with this fic. Loved the Xander and Spike portrayed here and the hints of their relationship. Lovely!

on 2007-11-20 12:44 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] mysticsoblivion.livejournal.com
Hehe, those were grand, just the right levels of everything to end my night on! Now, Mys can go to sleep with happy Spandery thoughts. *sigh*

on 2007-11-20 12:46 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] literati.livejournal.com
dude! I loff this so hard!

on 2007-11-20 03:41 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] texanfan.livejournal.com
I love Xander asserting himself here. It's perfect Xander. He does what needs to be done and then doesn't talk about it, kind of hopes everyone forgets he spilled all that TMI to Giles. :)

on 2007-11-20 05:43 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] savoytruffle.livejournal.com
A short roll. A roll that rolled at full speed through TMI-ville, out the other side and straight into Holy-crap-did-I-just-actually-say-that-to-Giles-town.

hee! happy spanderversary! and a present for us all.

on 2007-11-20 09:18 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] stretfordditto.livejournal.com
Excellent. Happy Spanderversary.

on 2007-11-20 01:14 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] thedabara-cds.livejournal.com
I love this verse!! So glad to see more of it!

Also, I'm working on a "5 secrets" fic for Bloodclaim's anniversary. But I'm late, late, late. Hopefully I'll get it done over thanksgiving.

All hail the best community on LJ - here's to Bloodclaim! *raises glass*

on 2007-11-20 07:04 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] vinniebatman.livejournal.com
I loved this series, and that ending line was great.

Another wonderful addition

~Alice~

on 2007-11-21 05:41 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] cordelianne.livejournal.com
Happy Spanderversary! I'm now trying to remember what the first Spander was that I read, I"ll have to think on that. And yay for your Spanderversary cause we get fic!

When reading the fic, this was my favourite part, and then scrolling through the comments I saw that rere and Camisha both quoted it but I really did appreciate it *before* seeing their comments, I swear!!! So after my random defensiveness, I shall praise you for the awesome Xanderyness of this:
A short roll. A roll that rolled at full speed through TMI-ville, out the other side and straight into Holy-crap-did-I-just-actually-say-that-to-Giles-town.

And Spander will always be my best and true love too!

on 2007-12-01 09:46 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] patyno.livejournal.com
Bloody Brilliant!!! Happy Spanderversary! "Waiting Here" was my introduction to my addiction of Spander. I only read Spander. It limits me, but I don't think there can be anything better. So I just stay with the best. Thanks for Bloodclaim cos you help feed my addiction. Once again, Happy Spanderversary!!!!

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